Home Psychology If someone uses these 7 unnecessary phrases, he or she may not have true confidence

If someone uses these 7 unnecessary phrases, he or she may not have true confidence

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If someone uses these 7 unnecessary phrases, he or she may not have true confidence

As humans, we tend to fear what we don’t know.

And confidants? Well, they sometimes fall into this category.

We might be intimidated by their unwavering confidence, their superhuman abilities, and their otherworldly swagger.

But I’m here to tell you that even the most confident person in the room isn’t perfect.

In fact, real, unadulterated trust is quite difficult to come by.

Many people can puff out their chest and feign confidence, but for it to be real, it has to come from deep within.

It must be embedded in your mind, body and soul.

In this article I’ll walk you through some expressions you might use when you’re not really confident.

So if you want to radiate true self-confidence, it is better to avoid these expressions.

Let’s dive in!

1) ‘I’m not sure, but…’ or ‘I could be wrong, but…’

Confident people don’t often add disclaimers before making a declarative statement or expressing an opinion or idea.

They beat around the bush and indicate insecurity or a lack of belief in their thoughts.

They just came right out with it.

They know instinctively that self-doubt is not beautiful, and that it can take away from the value of what they are trying to convey.

So instead of preparing for the fact that they might be wrong, they just say what they want to say.

If they are wrong, they will correct it later. It’s that simple.

2) “I’m sorry, but…”

Apologizing too much is a telltale sign of insecurity and a lack of trust – and for good reason.

You see, many insecure people fear that their statements might be somehow offensive or wrongly misinterpreted, and so they, almost instinctively, become anxious and apologetic.

But apologizing when it isn’t necessary screams inferiorityand wanting to make yourself smaller and gentler – the opposite of true confidence.

Saying “sorry” one too many times often backfires and causes irritation for the other party, especially if there was nothing to be sorry about to begin with.

I must admit that when I was a young man new to the world of employment, I was a bit of a serial over-apologizer.

Whenever I wanted to ask a valid question or ask for help from a manager or colleague, I almost always preceded it with “sorry, but…”

Or sometimes I’d open perfectly relevant emails with “Sorry to bother you, but…”

I was too young and naive to realize how insecure and, well, insecure, my “sorries” made me appear to my coworkers and bosses.

Remember, there is nothing inherently wrong with apologizing. In fact, the ability to say “sorry” every now and then is crucial to any relationship.

But if you do it in excess, your lack of confidence will make itself known.

Not a great look.

3) “Alone” or “alone”

Being a bit of a wordsmith, I’ve always been fascinated by how a single word can change the entire feeling and message of a given statement.

Using words like ‘just’ or ‘alone’ can often unconsciously convey vulnerability to others.

By using these words often you are somewhat downplaying your achievements or opinions, such as when someone says, “I thought that…” or “It’s just a basic idea, but…”

In some ways you expose yourself to scrutiny.

Be brave, confident and proud of what you have achieved.

Choose words that uplift and inspire rather than devalue.

4) “Maybe this is a stupid question, but…”

This is especially common among newcomers to a job.

They’re still actively learning the ropes and getting a feel for how things work, so it’s understandable that they might not memorize the employee handbook word for word.

The truth is that when it comes to a job, there are very few “stupid” or “stupid” questions if those questions help you complete your tasks more efficiently.

Your boss or coworkers won’t expect you to have the technical knowledge of a 20-year veteran, so when it comes to questions, fire away!

And don’t feel the need to preface legitimate questions with “maybe this is a stupid question,” because this reveals an inherent insecurity and fear of being seen as incompetent – ​​which you are not.

You’re better than that, and you know it.

5) “I don’t know if this makes sense, but…”

Again, you don’t want to communicate incompetence and doubting your inner thoughts towards others, regardless of the situation.

Don’t give that to them.

You don’t want to be the butt of jokes, you don’t want to be the bumbling employee who has no idea how to get the job done.

If you want respect, you have to express trust.

Occasionally, when I am with friends or colleagues, I am unsure of my ideas on a particular topic, but rather than give a disclaimer, I will express my thoughts as best I can.

Sometimes those ideas are well received and praised; other times they are ignored.

Either way, trust always wins. And self-doubt doesn’t do that.

The difference is enormous.

6) “I’m probably not the best person to ask, but…”

Even if you’re not the most skilled or qualified person on a given topic, by immediately adopting a passive attitude you’re communicating a lack of confidence… and a bit of lethargy, too.

You may not have all the answers, but what you can be is assertive.

And believe me, if you are assertive, the words will spread quickly.

You can point them in the right direction by recommending who to talk to or what resources to tap.

Not only will the person asking appreciate you and your efforts, but you will also build confidence in yourself.

7) “I’ll try…”

Personally, I hate hearing the words “I’ll try…”

Why do you want to know that? Because, ironically, “I’ll try” is often code for “I won’t try.”

By not fully committing to an answer, you give the other person false hope and create unrealistic expectations.

You show a hesitation and a lack of belief and will to achieve something or be somewhere.

This casual way of going about things will only end up creating resentment among those around you.

Instead of dealing with the discomfort of saying “no” and dealing with the reactions that follow, blurting out “I’ll try” is a cop-out – one that can be exceptionally misleading.

Confident people can face the music that reacts unfavorably; this is part of life…

The moral of the story? Don’t say “I’ll try” if you really don’t want to. People will respect your candor.

Last words

While most experts agree that most of our personal communication comes through body language, the everyday phrases we convey verbally also carry a lot of weight.

If you don’t have faith, all is not lost.

A great place to start is by changing your speaking habits.

Once you start speaking more confidently and dropping the passivity, you’ll notice some tangible changes in yourself – and in how others see you.

Take baby steps. Take things one day at a time.

With just a little dedication, you’ll get where you want to be soon enough. You got this.

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