7 things women do in relationships when they feel like they have no voice

Ever heard the saying, “silence speaks louder than words?” I find this especially resonates with women in relationships who for some reason feel like they don’t have a voice.

It’s a difficult situation.

Often women resort to certain actions to communicate their feelings indirectly, when they feel unexpected or undervalued.

In this article we will explore seven such behaviors. But remember: these are not mind games or manipulative tactics. Instead, they are desperate attempts at expression.

Let’s dig deeper and shed some light on this often misconstrued behavior.

1) They retreat into silence

Silence, they say, is golden.

But in a relationship, it can also be a telltale sign of dissatisfaction.

When women feel like they have no voice, they often retreat into a shell of silence. It’s not the comfortable silence you share with a loved one. Rather, it is a loud, piercing silence that screams, “I’m not okay.”

Why is this?

Because sometimes silence becomes the only tool to express dissatisfaction when words go unnoticed. It becomes their way of making their presence felt, ironically, through their absence in a conversation.

2) They overcompensate through actions

Now this one hits close to home for me.

There was a time when I felt unexpected in my relationship. It was like being stuck in the middle of a lake without an oar and screaming for help, but no one could hear me.

What have I done?

I started to overcompensate with my actions. I went out of my way to do things that I hoped my partner would appreciate and listen to. It was like I was trying to shout, “Look at me, appreciate me, listen to me,” with every job completed or meal cooked.

In retrospect, this wasn’t the healthiest coping mechanism. It only breeds resentment and exhaustion.

If you notice that your partner goes out of his way to do things for you, it may not be just out of love. It may be their way of screaming for attention and validation.

3) They become overly pleasant

Here’s another one I can personally relate to.

When I noticed that my words were falling on deaf ears, I decided to take a different route. I became the ‘yes’ woman. Agree to everything even when it went against my own interests or comfort.

Why did I do that?

I tried to avoid conflict, hoping that my compliance would somehow make my partner realize that something was wrong. I thought that if I agreed to everything and dropped all resistance, he would notice the change in dynamics and finally ask me, “What’s going on?”

But here’s the thing.

This approach didn’t work either. Instead of starting a conversation, it made me feel more invisible. It felt like I was erasing my identity little by little.

4) They look for external validation

When a woman constantly feels unexpected in a relationship, she may start looking elsewhere for validation.

Let’s break this down.

Not being heard often means feeling undervalued. This can lead to a serious dent in self-esteem. So to fill this void, she may turn to friends, family, or even social media for appreciation and validation.

This is not about seeking attention or approval from others. It’s about trying to reclaim the lost self-esteem.

It is essential to address this issue and reassure them that their voice matters.

5) They start to change their appearance

Did you know that our appearance can often be a reflection of our internal state?

When women feel voiceless in relationships, they may start to drastically change their appearance. This could be anything from a dramatic haircut to a sudden change in wardrobe.

But why would they do this?

Well, it’s like a silent announcement of their inner turmoil. A visual signal that something is wrong. By transforming their appearance, they may hope to spark a conversation about their feelings or express their need for change.

Don’t ignore sudden changes in your partner’s appearance. It can be more than just a style experiment. It could be their way of expressing a cry for help.

6) They begin to disconnect emotionally

Emotionally disconnecting is a defense mechanism I’ve used when I’ve felt unexpected in a relationship.

Despite the constant dismissal, it felt safer to build walls around my heart. I would remain physically present but withdraw emotionally, hoping that this emotional distance would serve as a wake-up call.

Even though it seems like an easy way out, it isn’t. The emotional disconnect only led to a greater rift between my partner and me, further complicating the situation.

Starting an open, empathetic conversation can help bridge this gap.

7) They may consider ending the relationship

This is the hardest part.

When all attempts to be heard fail, some women may consider ending the relationship. It is not a decision taken lightly, but rather a desperate measure taken when they feel there is no other way to regain their vote.

It’s a heartbreaking scenario, but it underlines the importance of communication and validation in a relationship.

If you notice your partner drifting away, don’t wait until it’s too late. Start a conversation. Validate their feelings. Show them that their voice is important to you and that they are an equal partner in the relationship.

Final thoughts

Awareness is the first step towards change. Once you’ve identified these behaviors, you can begin to address the underlying feelings of being unexpected and undervalued.

It is essential to establish open lines of communication in your relationship. Expressing your feelings and needs may be uncomfortable at first, but it is a crucial part of building a healthy, balanced partnership.

Remember that your voice matters. Your feelings are valid. And you deserve to be heard in your relationship.

Take small steps to make your voice heard. Start having open conversations about your feelings. Practice active listening with your partner and encourage them to do the same.

So be gentle with yourself as you navigate this journey. Celebrate your progress, no matter how small, and remember that it’s okay to ask for help when you need it.

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